It is just ten more days here in school before the half-terms begin, and I get well needed days off. School is a lot less intense though, and I’m wondering if it’s because I don’t have any ambitions yet, or because it is actually more relaxed.
Now it will soon be a month since I ran into the wall that is Cambridge, and I’d like to say that I have a clearer picture of what I want to do. I don’t, though. I have accepted an offer from the local university, and if I get the grades I’ll get the position. I doubt that I won’t get the grades since it’s just BAB in English, History and Philosophy.
I’m debating whether I should try to aim for the A* still. People that I talk to say that A-levels don’t matter anyway. They’re only useful for getting into a University. After University, they’ll be collecting dust in the drawers. If I have such low demands on me now, shouldn’t I just put on the cruise control and not give a toss for the rest of the term and the rest of the year?
If I put this monumental effort into getting A* then what purpose will that serve later on? I can’t think of what use it would be. Maybe I should use these last few months in this school to just get into trouble.
***
Things change, don’t they? Things remain the same, and still change all the time. It feels like being in a bubble of non-change in a chaotic world.
Dad is doing what he does best; navigating the corporate ladders. He’s been the CEO of an upstart company, and have guided it to not be an upstart anymore but to be a solid thing. And now he’s told me that he’s in negotiations to return to his old company, at a higher pay grade and a higher position.
Mum is packing her things because she has accepted a position here in England, and this autumn she’ll move to Warwickshire and settle into a rural cottage there. She finally found a management position that would could live with because she’d be some sort of science manager of a research lab up there. I don’t know the details yet, but when I spoke to her she sounded more excited than she’s been in quite some time.
It seems odd to have my parents inform me about all of this in passing, and I suppose that I’m well and truly out of their lives now. Not only does that feel odd, it feels a bit sad. We’ll be all over the place. Me down here in the South, mum up in the Midlands, and dad over in Sweden.
***
I voiced all this to Mark, and the mushy old git just said “We’re a family now”. I suppose that is true. He’s really a big softie.
This week-end he’s off on his brick-laying job, which has been put on the back-burner for a couple of months before the January exams, but now it’s time for him to take it up again. I still go over to Auntie and sit in her office at weekends, staring at the phone, and writing posts like these while I’m waiting.
Things don’t change. Everything changes. I don’t know what I feel about that. But tomorrow is an inset-day, so I’m off then, and I’ll have a three-day weekend. I can’t wait. We’re going over to Wiltshire for part of the day, so it’s time to get the car dusted off and refueled. Oh, and we need to do the weekly shopping as well. Back into the routine again.
Only you could talk of needing to achieve BAB at A-level as if it’s some low-level work – many A-level students would crave those results, and not achieve them no matter how hard they tried!
A* probably isn’t worth any more to any uni or prospective employer than A, but you can’t think ‘I won’t’ bother then, in case your lack of bother drops your motivation to the point where it loses you the ‘standard’ A.
I’m confused; your Dad is going back to his old company, to be higher than a CEO? Is there anything higher than that?!
If Mum’s back in England, it could be nice for you to have one parent who you can reach easily – even if you may not think so while you’re actually with her! Your Mum and Mark’s folks both being around could make Christmas visiting quite political though!
Mark is, of course, right though – you two are your own family unit now. Just make sure Mum knows that when she comes back!
Have a nice weekend!
No, my dad used to be an office manager at a big multinational, and he left to get some “real world” experience as a working CEO. Now he’s in negotiations to go back to the multinational as a department manager. I suppose the pay is better, and it probably looks better to be a department manager of a huge multinational than to be a ceo of a small company in Stockholm.
Life is like that. Always. But … your mom being in England could be a possible summer job for Mark? In any case, your self/life analysis is fascinating as always. Have a great weekend.
Oh, he has the offer from last year to come back there. He doesn’t think he will go, but keeps it in case he changes his mind.
Yes, get your A*s. Not for the sake of the marks themselves, which are just as worthless as people are telling you they are. Get your A*s so that you develop the habits of mind to do well at your university, whichever it is. It’s really hard to stay in an academic frame of mind if no one is giving you writing assignments. If you spend the next six months thinking of ways to get into trouble, the transition to university study will be much more difficult. It’s like suggesting you don’t work out for three months before joining the army, because you’ll just have basic training anyway.