Milling about without actually doing anything is not a strategy I recommend if you want to take it easy on the job. It makes tutors, lecturers, and other assorted authority figures give you something to do, because idle hands, you know…

It is better to seem to do something, or walk from point A to point B with purpose and intent. If you look like you have a clear goal when ambling about, people leave you alone. They think you’re busy, even if all you’re busy with is appearing busy. Does that count as doing something?

I have an assignment now that I don’t want to do because I didn’t seem busy, and there’s really no way of getting out of it without looking bad. As we all know, all that everyone is really concerned with is to look good.

Looking good is half the marks; never mind the real knowledge and understanding. If I can fool everyone that I’m actually intelligent and clever and eager, it will be a lot easier to push them to give me those high marks, even if my knowledge and understanding of something is faulty.

The eager and annoying candidate that knows everything and doesn’t mind telling everyone so has a much harder time. If a teacher doesn’t like this person, he or she will have to show true brilliance to get the high marks. 

Yes, I’ve figured everything out. Life is about being a chameleon that appear to be good, instead of actually being bloody brilliant. If you’re not actually bloody brilliant, telling everyone you know your shit and they don’t hurts the little egos and the little minds of the well situated. Those who have that little nagging sense of guilt deep in their hearts that they’re not really trying any more.

Is that a cynical thought? I don’t want it to sound cynical. I don’t like cynicism because cynicism isn’t actually constructive and clever and cool in any way. Cynicism is just locking down on the negative, and means never learning or progressing. The cynic is the one who never moves, who never develops, and who never learns.

I don’t want to be the cynic. But they, meaning the school, haven’t blocked WordPress, so I can pretend to be writing my assignment now, except for the fact that I’m practically done with this post now. Here I sit, hunched over the table and the laptop, looking so busy. And so phony. I’m a good little chameleon, am I not?

Sometimes I feel like I’m a manipulative little shit.

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